IYSISI Infographic

What is dating violence?

Dating violence involves committing an act of violence (or threatening to do so) in a dating relationship (i.e., where the couple isn’t living together). This includes acts or threats of sexual, physical, and/or emotional/psychological abuse.

Types of abuse:

Physical: Any unnecessary/unwanted physical contact with someone which results in bodily harm, discomfort and/or injury.

Examples include:

  • Hitting
  • Punching
  • Kicking
  • Restraining
  • Strangulation
  • Assault with a weapon
  • Withholding food or medical care

Sexual: Any type of sexual contact, to which a person does not voluntarily consent.

Examples include:

  •  Unwanted sexual touching
  •  Rape
  • Coercing someone into sexual activity
  • Treating a person as a sex object

Emotional/Psychological: Any act that diminshes dignity or self-worth, provokes fear, and/or intentionally inflicts psychological trauma.

Examples include:

  • Yelling
  •  False Accusations
  •  Intimidation/Threats
  • Degradation
  • Isolating someone from friends and/or family
  • Racial slurs

Other examples of abuse:

  • Harming pets
  • Destroying property
  • Coercive use of children
  • Sexual harassment
  • Criminal harassment
  • Financial abuse or exploitation
  • Neglect
  • Religious, Spiritual, and Cultural Abuse

Warning Signs

  • Doesn’t listen to your thoughts and opinions and always has to have their “own way”.
  • Monitors your activities and whereabouts (e.g., checks you phone and texts) and makes you “check in” with them all the time.
  • Tries to keep you from seeing or talking to other people.
  • Frequently degrades or criticizes you.
  • Gets extremely jealous or possessive.
  • Makes false accusations against you.
  • Threatens to hurt you (and/or you friends or family members).
  • Makes you feel nervous -as though you are always “walking on eggshells”.
  • Has large mood swings (e.g., gets angry and abusive and then is sweet and apologetic).
  • Is physically violent.
  • Has a history of violent behaviour in their previous relationships.
  • Pressures or forces you into having sex or going further sexually than you want to.

What can you do?

If you are a witness to abuse:

  •  Tell a reliable adult.
  • Listen to the survivor and provide them with comfort and understanding.
  • Encourage the survivor to get help on an ongoing basis.

If you are the abuser:

  • Tell a reliable adult.
  • Take responsibility for your actions –by learning and practicing different techniques for dealing with anger and frustration.
  • Get help (e.g., through counselling). In the District of Parry Sound you can contact:

If you are a survivor of abuse:

  • Tell a reliable adult.
  • Realize that you are not responsible –the abuser is the only person at fault.
  • Use the “Teen Safety Plan”.
  • Get Help.
  • Teen Safety Plan

A safety plan helps to lower your risk of being hurt by an abuser and includes information specific to your life.

Basic Safety Plan:

  1. In an emergency, I can call the Police (911)
  2. I can also contact the local Women’s Shelter:

Name:                                                                                                           

Phone Number:                                                                                           

  1. I can call the following friends/family at any time:

Name:                                                                                                           

Phone Number:                                                                                           

Name:                                                                                                           

Phone Number:                                                                            

  1. This code word will alert friends/family that I need help:                            
  2. Safe places that I can go to at any time include:

                                                                                                                                                     

                                                                                                                                                     

                                                                                                                                                      

Checkout our IYSISI booklet for a more detailed safety plan.

 

Resources & Links

Where can I get help?

Esprit Place Family Resource Centre 1-800-461-1707

Muskoka Parry Sound Sexual Assault Services 1-800-851-6662

Community Mental Health Services 1-800-461-5424

Children’s Aid Society 1-877-224-9354

Supervised Access Program 1-800-563-4201

24-Hour “Women’s Sexual Assault Help Line” 1-800-461-2929

Assaulted Women’s Helpline (154 Languages) 1-866-863-0511

Kids’ Help Phone 1-800-668-6868

Sexual Assault/Domestic Violence Treatment Centres

You can also get help from: Family, Doctors, Teachers, Friends, Coaches and Peer Support Workers. If you experience any type of physical, emotional, psychological, or sexual abuse in a dating relationship, discuss with people you trust and who can help you.